Women have long been subjected to the idea that "love" and "passion" can only be achieved through pain, tragedy, misery, and conflict. I guess stories of a reliable and loving husband who does the dishes and helps with the chores is not sexy. Even Buffy the Vampire Slayer, with all of its dazzling messages of feminism and female empowerment, still managed to put Buffy in bad relationships where she suffered and only fell deeper in love because of tragedy. But unlike BtVS, Twilight does not open the door to criticism when the heroine makes a bone-headed romantic decisions. Instead, the misery and abuse is touted as intense and utterly romantic love.
The flaws in Edward and Bella's relationship, the same flaws that would have us telling our friends to call the cops and go into witness protection in real life, are a mere nuisance that both drives and comes between their passion. Edward goes bonkers when he smells Bella's hair, so much so that he is physically sick to be next to her. We later find out that it's because her "scent" is so alluring and intense that he's too afraid to be around her. He can't trust himself with her because his true vampire nature boils with passion because her intense smell makes him so... hungry. Yes. Hungry! Now, I don't know about you, but when I'm dying for dinner and I sit down to a plate of yummy smelling lasagna, I don't stop and think about how much I want to make out with and marry my lasagna.
Twilight can make up all the excuses for why Edward is so passionate about Bella but he is primarily driven by his desire to feed on her. As we all know, vampires eat by grizzly murder, so are we then to deduce that Edward's stalking and obsessive tactics that are supposed to be out of love, are really about his homicidal desire to kill and then eat his girlfriend/victim? That seems pretty obvious to me. Oh but he's such a hunky guy and he's reformed. Homicidal serial killers can also be charismatic and charming and Edward admits as much when he tells Bella that everything about him is meant to attract her to him. You know those women that write letters to serial killers and propose to them? We think they're crazy and disturbed and yet, here we have a story about a guy driven by hunger, obsession, and murder and we are sympathetic to him and we are supposed to want his victim to be in his arms. Are we sick or what?
Bella totally plays the part of a psychologically battered woman who thinks her abusive relationship is "normal". How many times have I heard women say that they deserved a beating or that they're lucky to be with so and so (even though he is a nightmare) because he "loves" her? I have known women like that. Bella is shown to have a choice in the matter but this is merely an illusion because as I noted before, Edward's vampirism is supposed to draw her. He is in charge of her emotions and feelings through manipulation. She only thinks she is making her own decisions by choosing a relationship that can literally be the death of her. Her "love" for a guy she barely knows is nothing more than her falling victim to a vampire's hunting techniques.
Her life and all decisions are then motivated by Edward. I remember what it was like to be a teen and yeah, you think that these guys you crush on are worth everything. So I won't say that it's far fetched for Bella to act like a dumb teen, but there is no time for the audience to reflect on those bad decisions and consider the consequences. We just have to accept them because acting like an idiot in love is what makes love so amazing. These are the messed up ideas about what love is that we are putting into the minds of young girls who are looking forward to having boyfriends. Good men who are dependable, unconditionally loving, and emotionally supportive don't make it into pop culture. So then you get women who think that abuse is love and men who think that you have to be jerks to get a girl (see The Pickup Artist).
I'm old enough and have experienced love to recognize a bad romance when I see it but with the Twilight series doing so well in the box office it's obvious that teenage girls and even some adults have fallen for the vampire glamour. They just can't see that what they are celebrating is anti-feminist and all about domination and abuse. Even if you think I'm taking the movie too seriously and that it's just supposed to be mindless fun, Bella is a damsel in distress that can't do anything for herself. You don't even need to think too deeply to recognize that.
Plus, the movie was really slow and boring, cheesy, had horrific special fx, and the acting is schizophrenic.
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